The Power of Reiki never ceases to amaze me.  Each time I work with clients using Reiki, I am constantly impressed by the powerful way in which it allows people to heal their physical and emotional states.

Reiki allows you to practise relaxation and inner peace and release any pain or trauma that is held within the physical body.  When we are younger, and if we experience any trauma or pain, part of the healing process is to forget, block or repress what happened.  All humans do this.  There are so many people living their lives in a hypnotic "sleep" state unaware of the pain they are caring around.  We need to do this in order to survive the painful experience, but it can be the cause also of much suffering, illness and blocks to creating an abundant and happy life.  It is very important that we release and heal and Reiki provides the mind, body and spirit to do this. 

Working with Reiki allows me to tap into any pains or traumas stored in the physical body, and help the client to release the pain.   People that experience anxiety, depression, tight muscles or any physical illness, can be a symptom of the pain or trauma that is remembered by the physical body.   What I can do is assist the client in remembering the trauma (if necessary), that is causing the pain or illness and allow the body to heal and rebalance itself, giving the client a deep sense of peace and wellbeing.    This is why sometimes during a Reiki you may experience release through tears, smells, laughing, pain disappearing or receiving visions and a feeling of deep peace then comes over you during the Reiki experience. 

When I begin the Reiki I start to receive information regarding the trauma on an intuitive level from the physical body.  This allows me to assist the client in the releasing process.   Sometimes when a client books in for a Reiki I receive information during the booking and this is the beginning of the healing process for the client.  I continue to work with the client using Reiki to allow the body to heal and rebalance itself.  This is what it is designed to do but sometimes if we do not give our physical body the care that it needs, you will experience the pain on a physical and psychological level.  So many people are simply unaware of pain that is being carried within their body. 

A Reiki session typically lasts for about 1 to 1.5 hours. 

Stress and anxiety are common problems in relationships.  In my Couples Counselling Sessions, this is one of the major areas that couples require assistance, as stress can cause breakdowns in communication skills and trigger negative behaviour.  If there already problems within the relationship, busy lives can amplify the unresolved and suppressed needs.  Very often when couples are stressed they can default into one of four categories.  Passive, passive aggressive or aggressive.  When all issues have been resolved you are able to be assertive which means communicate calmly and effectively with your partner without underlying fear, resentment or anger.  This is a learned behaviour and unless we are lucky enough to have parents that are whole or self actualised, we all have unresolved issues and negative behavioural patterns as soon as we enter into a relationship and have children.

Here are my top 5 ways of reducing stress and anxiety in relationships naturally:

1.  Attend to your Physical Health 
When our bodies are in optimal health, we have stronger mental capacity to cope with stress, solve problems and control or let go of any worries.   Health experts say that just 1/2 hour of brisk walking or exercise a day can add 7 years to your life.   Sanjay Sharma, professor of inherited cardiac diseases in sports cardiology at St George’s University Hospitals NHS Foundation Trust in South London, said for the average person in their 50s and 60s, moderate exercise reduced the risk of dying from a heart attack by half.  When you feel good physically you will also relate to your partner in a more positive way.

2.  Find out the Cause of Your Stress and Anxiety
When we are anxious or stressed it is usually about something that might happen in the future or you are trying to achieve something in a short amount of time.  This causes the mind to go into a stress-state or an anxious state.  For example, you maybe trying to get the kids to bed and then get ready to go out with your partner in an unrealistic time frame.   Make sure you plan ahead so you can get time to put the kids to bed calmly, have a chat with the babysitter and then be looking fabulous for your date night with your partner or spouse.  If you feel yourself becoming stressed or anxious, take time to reflect at the end of the day what caused this feeling and remember to breath and focus on this moment to remove the stress or anxiety.

3.   Break Down Your Relationship Worries
Worrying about our relationship and our partners can create a huge amount of fear and anxiety in our minds and eventually, can have a negative affect on our health and wellbeing.   Taking time at the end of each day to reflect and discuss any concerns that you have about your relationship with your partner using "I" language will assist in removing any relationship woes.  Avoid the need to say "you make me feel" or criticise your partner.  This will only trigger negative feelings within your partner.  Share your feelings using "I" so your communication is clear and non-blaming.  For instance, "I felt very upset when you interrupted me while I was speaking to my father the other day.  I felt disrespected".  Allow your partner time to respond listening with empathy, mirroring and validating.

4.  Reduce Anxiety by Seeing Things in their Proper Context
Anxiety is caused by magnifying and worrying about small things constantly making them more important than they really are.  Ask yourself, is that really that important and discuss any issues with your partner in a calm and honest way.  Your partner can assist you in putting any worries into their proper context and reduce their intensity.

5.  Make A Plan
Your partner is your best friend, your lover and source of love and support.  Plan events and daily routines that will assist your life together to be more harmonious.  Make a financial plan, social plan and plans around the children's routines and daily chores.  That way you can work as a team and see each other as a source of support, love and safety rather than resorting to the unconscious way of relating which is the power struggle.  When you are in the power struggle you will argue, leave issues unresolved, blame your partner for your problems, criticise our partner and try to be "better" than them.  Love is a decision and when we love our partners, we transcend our self interest and direct our life energy toward the total welfare of our partner.

Staley Health offer a 12 Week Couples Counselling Intensive for any couples in crisis or requiring guidance on mastering their relationship.  For more information go to www.staleyhealth.com.

Staley Health is happy to announce that Nikki is now seeing clients on Saturdays at Glo Health.  Staley Health provides Holistic Counselling, Reiki and Meditation services for people needing to rebalance and heal any physical or mental imbalances.  Staley Health also have an amazing 12 Week Couples Counselling Program that enables couples in crisis to resolve and heal their current relationship issues.  If you would like to make a booking there are currently 3 spots left for Saturday 11th June at 1:00pm, 2:30pm and 4:00pm.  To book your appointment simply call Nikki on 0400 497 024 or book online.  For more information about Staley Health go to www.staleyhealth.com.  Discounted rates for existing Melbourne clients are available.

It is often thought that you go to a counsellor so they can "fix" your problems, but this is a common misinterpretation of what a counsellor does.  The counsellor is there to help you to become more self aware and to take control of yourself and your life.  It is a role that is empowering, challenging and at times, for the client, frustrating, as they experience the process of releasing negative behavioural and mental thought processes.   All illness - mental or physical comes from unconscious or negative thought processes.  To make changes in your life is hard, and the counsellor can support and enable healthy resolution and outcomes to any challenge the client maybe struggling with.  Those challenges can be the treatment of a mental illness, a physical illness, weight loss, relationship healing or enhancement, individual goal setting, dietary changes and many other life challenges that come our way.  The counsellor helps you to resolve any ambivalence (mixed feelings) that you may have regarding a behaviour change.   This is why many people say they want to lose weight, but never do, or they want a better relationship with their partner, or meet a new better partner, but are never able to make it happen because they are unaware of the unconscious agenda that goes on underneath the surface all of the time.  The counsellor brings awareness to the client what those unconscious agendas are that create illness and disorder, and is able to provide a way to enable the client to heal.     The counsellors role is to challenge and help resolve any discrepancies with behaviour change and increase self-efficacy in achieving goals.   

One of the ways the counsellor can assist the client in achieving this is through a technique called Motivational Interviewing.  This video demonstrates this technique.  In the video, the client has a danger of developing diabetes.  She needs to lose weight, eat healthier and introduce more exercise into her life.  The counsellor enables the client to make this behaviour change by developing the discrepancies.   You can watch it here. 

Counsellors are also not your friends.  Their role is to ensure that you receive the self awareness and insights to enable behaviour change.  This is why a counsellor cannot work with friends or family as that relationship is supportive and close.  The counsellor's role is to empower and increase self awareness to enable behaviour change and healing.

If you are interested in learning more about how counselling can help you, simply call Nikki on 0400 497 024 or go to www.staleyhealth.com.  Heal yourself today!