Parenting can be one of the most rewarding and challenging ways of learning about ourselves and others. Children learn from a very young age how the world is through the eyes of their parents and caregivers. If you wanted to go deeper into the relationship, we can begin to see our children as guides for ourselves also. I began my own inner journey when my son was only 11 years of age, I started to learn that he was showing me aspects of myself and the importance of the healing work that I needed to complete. There is no greater motivator than your children to be the best version of yourself, for in this way, you are modelling and pathing the way for them - showing them what is possible and the invaluable lesson that our power lies within our own spirit.
So how do we create a conscious relationship with our children? This is probably one of the most challenging but rewarding goals of our human existence. It all begins with a simple realisation that our role as parents is to guide and discipline our children and to prepare them for the world when they leave home. There is a process that involves teaching them about different aspects of life, helping them to socialise, learn self-discipline, be a good role model and a letting go process when they leave the family home. All of these stages of the child's life is experienced by both parent and child but it is important to get the "timing right" for each process and what each stage of the parent/child relationship involves. Becoming aware of these different stages can be tricky, and this is where a counsellor can assist you step into the necessary stage for any given time of the child's life.
There are different styles of parenting that are associated with different patterns of child development (Linver et al., 2002):
Authoritative parents are controlling but warm. They establish clear rules, consistently enforce them and reward children's compliance with warmth and affection. They communicate high expectations, caring and support. This is the most positive childhood outcomes. Children with authoritative parents tend to have high self-esteem, are higher achievers in school and have fewer conduct problems.
Authoritarian parents also exert control but do so within a cold, unresponsive or rejecting relationship. Their children tend to have lower self-esteem, be less popular with peers and perform more poorly in school than children with authoritative parents.
Indulgent parents have warm, caring relationships with their children but do not provide the guidance and discipline that help children learn responsibility and concern for others. Their children tend to be more immature and self-centred.
Neglectful parents don't provide warmth or rules or guidance. Their children are most likely to be insecurely attached, to have low achievement motivation and disturbed peer relationships, and to be impulsive and aggressive. Neglectful parenting is the associated with the most negative developmental outcomes.
These parenting styles are a good guide as to where parents could identify their current parenting style and a great place to start when beginning a conscious parenting relationship. Knowing where you are at and being honest with yourself is the beginning and assists with the improvement and growth of the conscious parenting relationship. You may have some aspects in one of the above categories and some in another, but what is important is knowing where you are at in the relationship. What a lot of people don't realise also is that we are deeply connected to our children, not only on the physical level but mentally and spiritually as well. These "unseen" areas are just as important as our own mental and emotional states and also influence our children's mental and emotional state. Conscious parenting is also understanding the importance of being fully present when talking to your children, when applying discipline and creating a safe environment in the home for the children to be able to express their different emotional states.
Being a parent is having clarity on what our role is and the power that lies within all of us.
Nikki Staley has been assisting parents of all ages to step into the role of "conscious parent" for over 10 years with her numerous skills as a holistic counsellor and meditation teacher. For more information go to www.staleyhealth.com
Ever struggled to create a happy and lasting marriage or relationship? Do you wish you could find out why your relationship is failing? Have you ever watched a romantic movie and wish "Oh, why can't I have that happy ending?" Well now you can, with my exciting Couples Counselling 12 Week Intensive Program. The Couples Counselling 12 Week Program is a fantastic new way that you can create the marriage of your dreams. This program is designed to assist you and your partner work through the challenges and unconscious conditioned actions that are destructive to your relationship. It brings to light the true meaning of what it means to be in a conscious relationship and how we can create one.
How does it work? Well each session, I take you step by step to become aware of your unconscious agendas and show you how to consciously co-operate with your unconscious to create a marriage that will satisfy your deepest needs. The sessions generally last from 1.5 hours to 2 hours depending on your schedule and occur one a week for 12 weeks to help you stay on track with the program. The scheduling of sessions is completely flexible to fit into your normal daily life and you can start at any time!
This transformational program changes your relationship into a lasting source of love and companionship and stimulates the process of healing that needs to occur within the relationship, so you can finally be in the relationship of your dreams!
To find out more about this AMAZING and LIFE CHANGING Program you can contact Nikki on 0400 497 024 or to book you can book online by clicking here.
Staley Health provide counselling and support for the celebrity and high profile clientele. Dealing with the stress and pressures of fame or being in the spotlight, can be challenging, and require a constant need to nurture and heal any unresolved pain and/or trauma that is "hidden" in the unconscious. Staley Health provide counselling assistance in a confidential and private environment where you receive the help and support that you need.
For more information contact Nikki on 0400 497 024.
Ever struggled to create a happy and lasting marriage or relationship? Do you wish you could find out why your relationship is failing? Have you ever watched a romantic movie and wish "Oh, why can't I have that happy ending?" Well now you can, with my exciting Couples Counselling 12 Session Program. The Conscious Couples 12 Session Program is a fantastic new way that you can create the marriage of your dreams. This program is designed to assist you and your partner work through the challenges and unconscious conditioned actions that are destructive to your relationship. It brings to light the true meaning of what it means to be in a conscious relationship and how we can create one.
How does it work? Well each session, I take you step by step to become aware of your unconscious agenda and show you how to consciously co-operate with your unconscious to create a marriage that will satisfy your deepest needs. The sessions generally last from 1 hour to 1.5 hours, depending on your schedule, and occur once a week for 12 weeks, to help you stay on track with the program. The scheduling of sessions is completely flexible to fit into your normal daily life, and you can start at any time!
This transformational program changes your relationship into a lasting source of love and companionship and stimulates the process of healing that needs to occur within the relationship, so you can finally be in the relationship of your dreams!
To find out more about this AMAZING and LIFE CHANGING Program you can contact Nikki on 0400 497 024 or to book you can book online by clicking here. Currently I am offering 25% off for people that book before 31st December, 2017. The sessions can commence anytime during 2018!
Meditation is a great tool to train the brain to focus and to let go of the constant chatter of the conditioned mind. The conditioned mind is formed from the ages of 0 to 8 years of age by learning "how the world is" through they eyes of our caretakers/parents and teachers who are around us during that period. The brain is like a computer and the "conditioning" or computer program is set for how we experience life. Once we leave the home of our caregivers we then have an opportunity to create "a new life" for ourselves. This is the time when we can change the "conditioning" or computer program of "how the world is". We can only make these changes by being present and the ability to be able experience life free of the conditioned mind. Meditation allows the brain to go to that place of stillness, rest and rejuvenation and allows for deep profound change and inner healing. Thus allowing for changes to be integrated and for new neuro-pathways to be formed in the brain. This translates to how we experience the world. A daily meditation practice is recommended every morning an evening and if you are working on changing any area of your life, meditation provides the space for this to occur. It has now been scientifically proven that a minimum of 6 months of daily meditation or Reiki practise, twice a day, (morning an evening) is required to make any conditioned thought processes permanent.
Reiki is another great tool that allows for the conditioned mind to be still or present. It creates a focus of wellbeing and healing and allows connection to our true nature. Reiki (or Reiki Ryoho), is a hands on healing modality/art that promotes wellbeing. It is great for stress, anxiety and illness which restores and rebalances our energy and thought processes; allowing for the body to do what it was naturally designed to do, and that is, heal itself.
The word Reiki is Japanese in origin and it refers to the universal energy. (Rei) means something mysterious, miraculous and sacred and (Ki) means the atmosphere, the unseen, or the energy of the universe. Reiki can be defined as a miraculous and sacred energy of the universe that sustains all life. If you would like to learn more about Reiki, Staley Health provide Reiki Courses and Clinic where you can learn or experience a Reiki treatment.
3. Nurture Relationships
Having healthy relationships with other people is one of the most important factors to contributing to a sense of wellbeing. This can include your partner or spouse, family, friends, co-workers and others in the community. Investing time and energy and learning how to nurture your current relationships can lead to great benefits for all involved. If you are having any difficulties with a current relationship Staley Health provide holistic counselling in a safe and comfortable environment to teach you ways of resolving and healing any relationship issues that you maybe experiencing.
Exercise is another important factor in creating wellbeing. It has been shown to reduce symptoms of depression and anxiety. Having a good diet is also a key element, avoiding excess alcohol or drugs, processed foods and sugar. Creating a wellbeing support network for yourself is important. Regular check ups with your health care practitioner can also help.
5. Be Thankful
Being thankful for the many blessings that you have in your life is another way of connecting to wellbeing. When we are grateful for all of the wonderful things we have in our life right now it actually attracts more happiness and blessings to us. Keeping a gratitude journal or reminding yourself everyday of just 3 positive things leads to increased wellbeing and abundance.
6. Identify your good points and strengths
Every person on the planet is different and we all have different strengths and weakness but finding out what you are really good at and using those talents can increase your wellbeing.
7. Create Flow
Flow is the state of being is when we are completely in the moment and when we appear to "lose track of time". This usually happens when we are doing an enjoyable activity at work, home in the creative arts or sports. People that are able to be in this state of flow experience more joy, happiness and inner peace and are able to achieve great things.
8. Give to Others
Making a contribution to the community, however small and no matter what it is, increases social wellbeing. A lot of people feel a sense of contribution through meaningful work, but this could also mean volunteering your time to help a neighbour, friend, family member or a community group. Doing something kind for someone is not only very helpful to others but also to ourselves. It is also very important to give to ourselves as it is a way of nurturing our own enjoyment and experience of life cancelling out the negative thought processes related to depression, stress and anxiety.
To learn more about keeping great mental, physical and spiritual health, you can go to www.staleyhealth.com.
Dr Roger D Nelson, Director of Global Consciousness Project at Princeton University, has been researching consciousness since 1997 using random number generators located around the world. These random number generators are electronic devices connected to computers that generate random numbers in the form of 0’s and 1’s at the rate of 200 per second. This is the same in concept as tossing a coin repeatedly. The data is uploaded to a main computer at Princeton University and the data is logged. Chance dictates that if you toss a coin 100 times, it will land on heads 50% of the time, and tails 50% of the time. And this is typically what the random number generators do-most of the time. The fascinating thing about this research is that these random numbers seem to become less random when the global consciousness is focused on one single issue. The most stunning example of this was on September 11, 2001. Not only did the random number generators become less random when the planes were hitting the Twin Towers in New York City, but according to Nelson, “The random number generators started changing 4 or 5 hours before the first plane hit”. Another example is when Hurricane Katrina hit New Orleans, Louisiana and the Gulf Coast in August 2005.
The above research offers compelling evidence that we are a global human family – a global consciousness – and are connected in ways that we may, or may not have not been aware of, up until now. This research appears to scientifically confirm what many of the ancient mystics have said; namely, our thoughts have an effect on reality.
The Maharishi Effect says that positive results can come if a very small percentage of the population focuses on a single outcome at the same time. The percentage is the square root of 1% of the population. This means that only 100 people are needed to effect change in a city of one million. Only 8,367 people are needed to effect change for the whole planet (based on 7 billion people).
If those of us who strive for world peace and unity can contribute our efforts to raise the vibrational level of those within our sphere of influence, we stand a better chance of effective positive change on our planet. We can do this! And it starts with each one of us focusing our deliberate intent on peace, tolerance, kindness and love.
On 11th November, 2016 at 11am Nikki Staley will be holding a Global Mediation at The Kindness Co in Torquay. This mediation will be televised world-wide to enable everyone to participate in whatever time zone you may find yourself. Remember, we only need 8,367 people to participate and you will be the change that we wish to see in the world. You can participate by coming along to the Kindness Co at 5 Zeally Bay Road, Torquay at 10:45am for a 11:00am start. The meditation will go for 15 minutes. If you are unable to attend you can attend via Skype. A link will be provided for you to connect via Skype one week prior to the event.
Please share this with friends and family to help raise the consciousness of the planet. To join simply click here https://www.facebook.com/events/555770277931886/.
Nikki has her Doctorate Degree in Philosophy, specialising in Metaphysical Science, is an accredited Holistic Counsellor, Reiki Master and teacher who was born in Melbourne, Australia. She is a member of the Australian Holistic Healers & Counsellors Association (AHHCA) and the Australian Reiki Connection (ARC) and is an honourary member of the U3A. She also has completed her Nationally Accredited Certificate II - First Aid Training and has a Working with Children card. Nikki has appeared on many radio shows and was even offered her own TV Show. She loves sharing her knowledge through her classes and speaking appearances on holistic health and wellbeing. She is currently studying psychology at Deakin University. For more go to www.staleyhealth.com.
For a limited time only Staley Health will be helping you back on track to getting the love that you want. On Saturday 23rd January, 2016 at 10am you can register to join this amazing webinar and get my tips and tricks on getting the happiness and fulfilment you are looking! Look forward to connecting soon.
When you experience some form of pain within your body it is a signal to pay attention! Sometimes pain is a good indicator and can be used to keep us safe. If you fall or touch a hot oven it serves us well! It's purpose is useful in times to warn us of danger and to be more careful, but if you experience chronic pain it is a signal to go deeper and to listen to what your body is trying to tell you.
Reiki can be a great way to do this. Reiki enables the mind to distract us from the pain we feel within our body and to focus on the symbols which then allows us to connect to the universal healing energy. This energy then flows through the body and begins to heal the pain until it completely disappears. Think of a time when you felt that you were pain-free and happy. You may have been on holidays with your family or partner, or it may have been a time in your life when you were happy, balanced and carefree. Close your eyes and imagine that time right now, remember how it felt to be pain-free, joyful and happy. How do you feel? Often my 11 year old daughter will be playing with her friends and hurt herself but will not feel any pain because she is focused on having fun with her friends. Many times I remember asking her "How did you get that bruise?" and she will reply "I don't remember, I never felt any pain from it?". You see we can train the mind to tell our body what to feel with Reiki and change what our bodies feel. Reiki enables us to have more control over our thoughts and with regular treatments - get rid of that chronic pain or illness. Reiki practitioners can use Reiki daily to help with their own pain management. Its a great tool that can be used at anytime.
So how is pain created and how does Reiki work to ease or remove pain within the body? Well your mind sends messages to the body of disease or discomfort either through an external source (ie. hot oven or fall etc.) or from an internal discomfort (thinking about the many activities that need to be achieved for that day = stress or having to interact with someone you find challenging), and then the mind sends the signal of pain to the body. We can then have an emotional reaction or we can feel a physical "pain". Our bodies are our best friends and it is there to show us either danger or any imbalance we may have within our thoughts. When we use Reiki to manage the pain, the problems dissolve and the pain disappears as we are focusing on, or meditating on the Reiki symbols, allowing for the universal sacred energy to flow through us. This then heals the physical body of any discomfort or removes the pain completely.
Reiki is a great tool, which can be used anywhere at anytime you need it, and with regular treatments or regular practice you can achieve a pain free body.
You can book Nikki for a Reiki treatment or if you would like to learn, she now teaches Reiki at the Spring Creek Community House. The first level of Reiki is on Saturday 5th & 6th December, 2015. For more information, or to book, click here.
When we decide to get married we always imagine that we are going to be with this person "of our dreams" for the rest of our lives. But what a lot of people going into marriage don't know, is the secret to creating a loving and lasting relationship. Most people are unaware that the reason you were attracted to your "soul mate" , dream partner, or "the one" is to heal yourself! It is actually an unconscious decision to get unmet childhood needs and desires fulfilled that were created during childhood.
The hidden (or unconscious) agenda of marriage and falling in and out of love, involves a complex process of human growth and development. When we are born, we are free of the conditioned mind, we are one with our heart, soul and spirit. No conditioning has been formed in the mind. We may also have cellular memories of past life conditioning which actually matches those of our parents or caretakers when we are born. But whether you believe in past lives or not, the baby develops the conditioned mind from the parents, caregivers and environment that he or she grows up in. If our parents or caretakers are enlightened, our feelings of aliveness and wellbeing are sustained and we may remain whole.
But unfortunately, that is not how it actually happens. Our goal as humans is to develop a conditioned mind to then master it - and let it go. In other words be aware of what that actually means. Becoming conscious of our true nature which is being without thought. Our parents are not able to maintain the perfect standards of what is required, and even the best parents are not available every minute for our needs and wants. What actually happens is that our parents or caretakers pass on their own childhood experiences, deficiencies and unmet childhood wounds, thus forming the conditioned mind. Tired, angry, depressed, busy, ill, distracted, afraid, or sad our parents fail to sustain our feelings of security and comfort. With every unmet need causes fear and pain and in order to survive we adopt by creating primitive coping mechanisms. Depending on our temperament and the nature of our caretakers' neglect, our defences can take many forms. We may cry constantly to get attention or withdraw from the touch of attention - our neglectful caretakers, denying that we even have needs. Though we do what we can, already the world feels unsafe, and love is rationed. This is not about blaming our parents or caretakers, they did they best they could with what they knew, it is about becoming aware of what is truly going on.
So how does how this affect my marriage or relationship, you may ask? Well when we choose our "life partner" they represent all of the unfinished business (or unmet childhood needs) that we did not get from our parents or caretakers. This is the secret on truly knowing what marriage or a long term committed relationship means. What your soul or heart really desires is to resolve and heal the pain and trauma from our early childhood and this can include grandparents and babysitters. This is why after the "honeymoon period" things begin to fall apart and you want to divorce or end your relationship because the truth of the relationship begins to surface. Choosing our life partner is a choice to become whole and your partner represents the healing that you need to complete within yourself. Your life partner is able to help you repair the damage done in childhood as a result of needs not being met. Our partner is potentially able to give us what our caretakers failed to provide.
Dr. Nikki Staley is a Counsellor and Metaphysician with over 10 years experience counselling couples and individuals. To learn more about Nikki simply click here.
Staley Health has an amazing 12 Week Intensive Couples Counselling Program that allows for this healing and change within the marriage or relationship to occur. Bringing to light clarity of what is going on in each individual and learning new ways of being within the relationship. This proven 12 week program allows for couples to heal and grow and to be in a loving, happy relationship. Until the end of January 2018 Nikki is offering 25% off the program - that's $500 off if you book now. To book or learn more information about this program simply call Nikki on 0400 497 024 or send an email to book your first session.
Nikki is a Metaphysician, Holistic Counsellor, Reiki Master and Teacher. She loves sharing her knowledge on holistic health and wellbeing.
11 Headland Drive, Torquay
358-360 Glenhuntly Rd, Elsternwick